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How to get out of a rut: 8 tips for finding purpose

May 15, 2024 - 17 min read

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What does it mean to be stuck in a rut?

6 signs you’re in a rut

5 reasons why you feel stuck in a rut

How do you pull yourself out of a rut?

You have the power to change your life

You have goals and parts of your life that you love. But lately, you have no motivation to put in the work — and even your favorite hobbies feel boring.

Maybe you woke up one day to realize that the colors of life have dimmed to monochrome, or it’s been a slow journey to recognize this feeling. Either way, these are signs that you’re in a rut. Your day-to-day life has no excitement, you’re languishing, and it feels like things will never change.

While escaping a rut can be challenging, it's far from impossible. Whether you’re experiencing a quarter-life crisis or a general dip in motivation, you can learn how to get out of a rut with the proper insights and strategies. 

What does it mean to be stuck in a rut?

Being in a rut is a personal experience. For some people, it might feel like life is just boring, and for others, it could be an effect of mental fatigue or burnout. Generally, a rut is a state of life that makes you feel like every day is the same, you have no purpose, and you can’t take action toward change. More than a fleeting dip in mood, it’s a lingering feeling that can start to negatively impact your life.

Learning how to get out of a life rut involves rediscovering yourself and the things that fulfill you. It often requires a shift in perspective, a kindling of curiosity, or a small but significant change in routine. 

Instead of losing yourself in the mundane, you have to navigate your day-to-day with a renewed sense of purpose, transforming familiar paths into new ones that make you happier. You don’t have to treat every daily task like an adventure — but you do have to recognize its worth in your life.

6 signs you’re in a rut

Feeling stuck is more common than you might think. A 2023 study of 2,000 adults conducted in the United Kingdom found that 61% of respondents felt like they were stuck in a rut. And 59% went as far as to say their life needed change. 

But just because it’s common doesn’t mean it’s easy to navigate. If you aren’t sure whether you’re having a bad month or truly stuck, these characteristics can help you. Just remember you might not experience every single one. This is just a guideline for identifying your feelings. 

  1. Lack of inspiration and motivation: When you're in a rut, the spark of inspiration might dim. Even once-loved activities could feel like chores. This lack of motivation isn't just the occasional off-day but a persistent state where your usual passion for life is missing. 
  2. Dominance of negative thoughts: Your mindset shapes your reality, and when negative thoughts take over, it can feel like a vicious cycle. Automatic negative thoughts could include, “I’ll never feel fulfilled,” or, “I’m failing at life” — things that could dig you deeper into a rut.
  3. Goals feel insurmountable: If your to-do list or goals overwhelm you, you could be in a rut. Even if there are things you want to achieve, they seem impossible, and that feeling can lead to procrastination and burnout. 
  4. Monotonous routine: When every day feels like you're on autopilot, your routine may stifle you. You might dread small things like getting out of bed in the morning, making dinner, or simply doing laundry. Going to work might also feel uninspiring and undesirable.
  5. Elusive fulfillment: A telltale sign of a rut is the feeling like something's missing from your life. You might feel unfulfilled or like you have no purpose but just aren’t sure how to get that feeling back. This might also manifest as an existential crisis.
  6. Desire for change without action: In a rut, you might already know what you need or want to change about your life, but acting on it feels impossible. You’re comfortable enough that changes don’t seem like they’re worth the effort, even though you know you’d be happier.

5 reasons why you feel stuck in a rut

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Learning how to get unstuck in life requires acknowledging where you are and taking baby steps toward where you want to be. It might involve improving your social life, starting physical activity, or simply listening to a motivational podcast. Change might feel impossible, but if you already know what your goals are, it’s worth it to dive in. 

It's easy to fall into a pattern that feels safe but ultimately leaves you feeling unfulfilled. The comfort of predictability can slowly morph into a rut, so if this is the case for you, periodic breaks from your usual routine could bring you more purpose. But sometimes, a rut can be a symptom of a more serious problem. 

Dysthymia, also known as persistent depressive disorder, mirrors the experience of being in a rut with its chronic symptoms like low energy, mood, and pleasure.

This form of depression can interfere with your ability to move through life, often escaping diagnosis due to its subtlety. If you’ve been stuck in a rut for a long time and feel like you can’t get out, it could be time to speak to a mental health professional about your symptoms. 

However, most ruts are a product of a fixed mindset or lifestyle. Besides dysthymia, here are some reasons you could feel stuck in a rut:

1. Repetitive decision-making

When you make the same choices repeatedly, life can feel like it’s on repeat. Maybe you eat the same meals every day or watch the same TV show over and over instead of trying something new to save some mental energy after stressful days at work. This cycle often leads to predictable and uninspiring outcomes, leaving you feeling stuck and tired of making decisions.

To get unstuck, consider breaking up your routine with small changes. Try a new hobby, listen to a different genre of podcast, or take a different route to work. These small steps can lead to significant shifts in perspective and help you move forward.

woman-scrolling-how-to-get-out-of-a-rut

2. Comfort zone boundaries

Comfort zones are cozy, but they're also potential growth barriers. It’s when you’re unafraid to take baby steps beyond these boundaries that you truly learn how to get out of a rut in life. Whether it's a new project at work or joining a social group, pushing past your comfort zone can expand your horizons and show you that change is possible.

3. Echo of past failures

The memory of past failures can drown out the excitement of new ventures. If you didn’t do well the last time you landed a new job or didn’t enjoy moving the last time you changed apartments, those experiences might deter you from making a change. Reset your mindset by practicing gratitude for these lessons and recognizing they're stepping stones to self-improvement.

4. Disconnection from core values

Feeling stuck can sometimes mean you've strayed from your personal values, like creativity, independence, or determination. Realigning with what matters most in your life can give you a renewed sense of purpose. Reflect on what you value, then align your actions with these principles to feel more connected to your life.

5. Fear of uncertainty

The unknown is scary, and the fear of what lies ahead can overshadow the potential for joy and new experiences. But again, staying in your comfort zone won’t lead to improvement. 

Embrace uncertainty as a natural part of life and an opportunity for growth. Seeking support from loved ones or a life coach can provide the courage needed to face the unknown with optimism.

How do you pull yourself out of a rut?

Each day is an opportunity to make small changes that can have a profound impact on your well-being. Whether it's setting a simple to-do list to tackle procrastination or finding a new source of inspiration, you have the power to navigate out of the rut and rediscover joy in your life.

To emerge from a rut, assess your life to recognize any habits leading to stagnation. Just keep in mind that having a routine isn’t a bad thing. Studies show that consistency in healthful habits like regular exercise, balanced nutrition, and adequate sleep is key to long-term well-being.

Instead of ditching structured behaviors entirely, use new habits to foster the physical health and emotional resilience that your current routine lacks. 

Getting out of a rut won’t be instantaneous, but it’s a commitment to incremental change. Here are eight tips for getting started:

1. Take an honest inventory of your life

Start by assessing your current state and why you might feel stuck. Do you need more motivation due to a lack of challenge? Is a quiet social life causing loneliness? Does your job bring you joy, or does it feel like just a paycheck? 

Sometimes, recognizing that you're in a rut is the catalyst to get out of it. Set aside time for this critical self-reflection and be truthful about what you discover. You might find that one or two changes are enough to get you out of it — or you might see that you’ll need big adjustments to connect with your purpose.

writing-how-to-get-out-of-a-rut

2. Find the roots of your rut

Understanding why you’ve hit a standstill is crucial to getting out of it. You’ll be able to pinpoint what needs to change in your life and start paving a path to get there. If you discover that your job contributes to your rut, it could be time to take on more responsibility or seek a career change.

You might also find that your rut is a sign of a larger mental health issue. To learn how to get out of a depression rut, seek help from a mental health professional like a therapist. They’ll help you dive deeper into your feelings and decide on the next steps you should take.

3. Self-reflect

Look inward to find your purpose and discover what parts of life truly matter to you. What activities bring you joy? What are your core values? What do you want your life to look like? Engaging in self-reflection can help you reconnect with your own life and start doing the Inner Work® you need to grow.

4. Take care of yourself

A healthy mindset isn't a luxury. It's a necessity. Taking care of your emotional well-being sets a foundation for the rest of your life, giving you the energy and motivation you need to get out of your rut. Whether you accomplish this through physical activity, mindfulness, or setting aside time for self-care, take the necessary steps to look after yourself.

5. Cultivate a daily practice of gratitude

Practicing gratitude can shift your perspective. Start or end your day by noting what you're thankful for. Even small things like your morning cup of coffee or walking in the sunshine can remind you what you love about life. And when you reflect more on what you’re grateful for, you know what activities to pursue for happier routines.

6. Chart a course with clear goals

Setting clear, achievable goals provides a sense of direction and something to focus your energy on. It also gives you things to look forward to, celebrating the small steps and victories along the way. This practice helps to build self-esteem and motivates you to keep moving forward.

7. Spend time with loved ones

Humans are inherently social beings, so spending quality time with family and friends provides much-needed connection and joy. Nurture relationships that offer support and happiness as you work to get unstuck. They could be the cheerleaders you need to reach your goals.

8. Forge habits that nourish your physical and mental health

Developing brand-new habits that promote your physical and mental health can be transformative, especially if your previous routines weren’t serving you. Whether you decide to start a new project, adopt a new hobby, or simply get more sleep, healthy habits can create positive ripples that slowly help you start over with the life you want.

You have the power to change your life

Understanding how to get out of a rut is a transformative skill that can revitalize your life. By taking deliberate steps to re-engage with the things you love, you harness the power to not only leave the rut behind but sculpt a future rich with purpose and joy.

As you step forward, remember that each movement, no matter how small, is one away from the rut and toward the life you want.

Published May 15, 2024

Elizabeth Perry, ACC

Elizabeth Perry is a Coach Community Manager at BetterUp. She uses strategic engagement strategies to cultivate a learning community across a global network of Coaches through in-person and virtual experiences, technology-enabled platforms, and strategic coaching industry partnerships.

With over 3 years of coaching experience and a certification in transformative leadership and life coaching from Sofia University, Elizabeth leverages transpersonal psychology expertise to help coaches and clients gain awareness of their behavioral and thought patterns, discover their purpose and passions, and elevate their potential. She is a lifelong student of psychology, personal growth, and human potential as well as an ICF-certified ACC transpersonal life and leadership Coach.

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